Funniest Joke in the World

For those of you who are not familiar, there is a classic Monty Python sketch based around the plot that an English jokesmith creates an anecdote that inevitably results in the death of whomever should hear it. The joke then is employed by the British armed services in WWII. The joke is never heard in it's native tongue, but only in the German translation (worked on at a ratio of only one person per word...as they say, "one translator accidentally saw two words and was in a coma for weeks"....or something along those lines).

Anyway, for years I had been under the assumption that the German joke told in the episode did have an English translation that would result in an actual joke (secretly I expected some classic Vaudevillian one liner that everyone knows). Well, today Wikipedia has given me the answer, and I have survived. Here is the joke in both versions...READER BEWARE!


GERMAN: Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! ... Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput.


ENGLISH: "When is the nowpiece 'git' and 'Slotermeyer'? Yes!... 'Beier'dog the or the 'Flipper'forest 'gersput'."


If you are still reading this now, then you obviously have not expired. That was always the greatest apprehension I had with translating this joke: would it be satisfying and funny enough to literally kill me, or would I be disappointed and still alive after reading the translation. To be honest, I am somewhere in the middle...the power of the joke is somewhat diminished by the fact that there was not a mortal result; however, there are still some pieces of gibberish in there that when properly translated could make this joke lethal.

The more I think about it, the more brilliant it is. I like to assume that those Monty Python guys are pretty damn smart, and had the foresight to know that people would never resist translating "the joke." By making parts of the joke completely untranslatable, they have still maintained the integrity of the joke's ability to cause the instantaneous expiration of any given individual. Sleep soundly in your beds, the joke remains safe.

Strangely enough...I think it makes me laugh more when I hear it in German.

Same to same,

Capt. Patrick Hendry
Commanding Officer Joke Division