I have thought over the past couple of years that it might be nice to have a mustache, if for no other reason than that it is one of the few facial hair combinations I have not tried out. Well, that isn't entirely true, I did have one in a play where I portrayed a 1920's film director, and it was fashionable in its own way (perhaps only because it was reinforced by the nostalgia of the role I was playing). Still in the greater part of a decade that has passed, I have not grown a solitary mustache of any kind.
Most people seem to think this has been a wise decision on my part. I am not a law enforcement officer, biker, rescue worker, armed forces member, country music star, baseball player, NASCAR fan nor a member of any of the other various social or employment based groups that have embraced the mustache and made it their own. My particular social group seems to be lacking an identifying mustache, and it has fallen into that less distinctive jumble of goatees, beards and sideburns. In this particular group a mustache comes across as usually being creepy, which is unfortunate because just once I'd like to bust out a nice simple 'stache and feel dashing like Eroll Flynn, Vincent Price or even Frank Zappa.
Even more depressing, my great-grandfather had a toothbrush mustache. (Not sure what I am talking about? What if I say a Hitler mustache?) A part of me has always had a desire to emulate this predecessor of mine (my Polish great-grandfather) with a similar styling of facial hair, but I think realistically I must accept that this mustache has been forever tainted. If I bust that puppy out, I will without a doubt be seen as trying to be more Aryan than ancestral.
So for now, I will stay with my beards and goatees and every now and then the regrettable clean shave. Perhaps in the future I will go back to those sweet lambchop sideburns I had in high school, for as one teacher said to me "I love your sideburns, they were very stylish back in the 1700's." To this day I really think that she was giving me a compliment, but I still haven't found a good way to interpret, "Hey a**hole! Nice Hitler 'stache!"
Same to same,
Hendry
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4 comments:
You should DEFINITELY rock the 'stash! I feel like Jason Lee is bringing it back for the everyman in a big way. It kills me that he grew that for My Name Is Earl. He's keepin it real.
I also was envisioning a My Name is Earlesque stash. Go for it!
No! Don't do it!
Wifey don't like the 'stashes. That may be in large part why he hasn't busted it out. The creepy factor is high on my list of why NOT to do it...not to mention I like the full beard.
Dude, either grow the stash or give up your borderline pervert status. No more closet for you!
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